Sunday, June 17, 2007


I'm not one for order, but I do keep lists. Rather a lot of lists. Lists of goals, lists of songs I need to buy, lists of people to politely ignore, lists of countries to visit, that kind of thing. And yes, I invariably lose the lists, but at least I have a general idea of what's on each one.

One important (and long) list is the Never List. This is a list of things that don't fit with my worldview or what I want from life, and so I will never, never do them. The list is not exhaustive but it has the things I do over and over again because I always forget the consequences.Nothing on the list will make me happy in any way at any time. This is the current incarnation of the Never List:

1. Flirt with BART passengers
2. Discuss race or racism
3. start a load of laundry and get in the shower
4. say insofar, inasmuch, or everso
5. go into malls or grocery stores
6. Cut my hair by myself
7. Wear things on the Never Wear List
8. Do things on the Life's Too Short List

Now, there are many things that don't need a list because they are ingrained, and that's why killing children and taking people's walkers and setting churches on fire are not on the Never List. But I have to be careful with the never list, it's not something I can automatically follow. Part of the Never List is avoiding situations that would lead to doing something on the Never List.

For instance, UC Santa Cruz has 10 colleges, Cowell, Stevenson, Crown, Merril, Porter, Kresge, Oakes, Eight, Nine, and Ten. Kresge College has a social justice focus, so joining them would violate #2 on the Never List. No problem, Caitlan Of Three Months Ago asserted. I applied to Porter, which has an arts focus. Art would be on my Always List if I needed one. The rest of this story is too depressing, and I'm sure you can see where it's going.

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