Capitol One Security Questions

I don't know the answers to these questions. I couldn't log into my Capitol One account today, so I called their tech support.
"What can I help you with today?"
"I locked myself out of my account by not knowing the name of the hospital where I was born."
"I'm sure it's not a question of not knowing the name, but we're moving from a three question system to a five question system, so it will want you to set new questions."

And he unlocked my account and told me to set five security questions. And I am really trying. But my best friend in high school had a hyphenated last name and only went by one of the names. Just yesterday I was looking at my father's mother's new address label and wondering what the "P" stands for. I don't know how to spell any of my teacher's names before 3rd grade. Luckily, my grandfathers had the same profession. But that still leaves four more security questions to set. I will have to remember (read: won't remember) to not get confused by the present tense, when I go to log into this account in six months, and type "retiree."